GOP vs 14th Amendment

92 members of the House GOP want to end jus soli by amending or subverting the 14th Amendment. Discuss.— The Los Angeles Times is running a front-page article on Saturday and Sunday with the headline “GOP Faction Wants to Change ‘Birthright Citizenship’ Policy“. In a nut shell, some GOP politicians […]

Letter to an Old Friend, II

Damian, you sinister sphinx, I know you and that pantless freak Tore are behind this obcenity. But I’m on to you! I knew I’d find you hiding in the HREF=”http://search.ebay.com/search/search.dll?cgiurl=http%3A%2F%2Fcgi.ebay.com %2Fws%2F&krd=1&from=R8&MfcISAPICommand=GetResult&ht=1&SortProperty=MetaEndSort& query=mishap+productions”>depths of Ebay between the HRF=”http://listings.ebay.com/pool3/plistings/list/all/category1466/index.html? from=R10”>uranium nitrate anal beads and black-light reactive enema nozzels. Where’s HREF=”http://www.crapcore.com/mishap_records-artists.htm”>James, you bastards?! […]

Leaving Las Vegas

On August 7th I caught a morning flight on Southwest, OAK-ABQ direct, and began one of the great adventures of the year. Shannon met me at the gate and we went off searching for a convertible. Half an hour later after considerable sweet talking and a little badge-flashing (“oh! You’re […]

90% of America’s Imports

President George Bush is reputed to have said “90% of Americas imports are now coming from overseas.” This unfortunate statement is deceptively meaningful, but false. If accurate it suggests one of three (equally plausible) things about the President: (1) He doesn’t have a firm enough grasp of economics to know […]

This is Too Much

I stand corrected, the coverage is indeed better than I expected. There are still more talking heads and recycled footage on my TV than I would like, but we are getting the occasional burst of video from in-country (and I suspect my Limited Cable is short-changing me). Strangely, they the […]

“1 out of 2 ain’t bad…”

Mr. & Mrs. Passports. Visas. Computer: ho-hum. Yaddie yaddie? Yaddie yaddie yaddie. Yaddie? Yaddie Yaddie. Bang Bang Bang Bang. It’s another day at the office, this time behind the glass at San Francisco International Airport. Flights come in, flight go out. In comes a Mexicana Airlines flight filled with US […]

La Milagro Con La Migra

“The Miracle With Immigration” So Homeboy is a green card holder with a criminal record and he gets fingered by the computer coming back to San Jose International from his grandmother’s funeral in Mexico. He gets asked all the usual questions, fingerprinted and photographed. But when the officers peel back […]

I understand. It’s your job.

Homeboy walks off a Mexicana Airlines flight at San Jose International Airport, waits in line and hands me his passport, I-94 and Customs Declaration. He’s a little too happy to be here. I look at his passport – it’s Costa Rican – and think “what the hell is he doing […]